The New World
by The Kraken
Summary: The Third Impact has come and gone, but its effects were nothing like what was predicted. How will humanity managed to survive in the third era of mankind?
1. Default Chapter

Disclaimers: If I owned Evangelion, do you really think that I would bother to write fanfiction? Or would I just make more episodes? Duh.  
  
Warnings: Pretty much par for course, as far as Evangelion and my literary style go. There will be graphic violence, adult language, and sexual innuendo. What would you expect instead? Teddy bear EVA's? Not likely.  
  
****************************************************************************  
  
The New World  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
Episode 1  
  
  
Shinji knew that it was trouble the second that the large group of burly men stepped into the bar. After having this scene repeated so many times, he was just growing weary of it all. He stood up so that the men could see him right away and hurry up with it, instead of wasting time searching for him.  
  
Sure enough, the men stomped over to him the second that they saw him. They might as well have had the words "Lynch Mob" branded on their foreheads, for all the subtlety that they carried themselves with. As they came to Shinji and faced off against him, the contrast was perfect. Shinji's smooth and youthful features versus the rugged faces of the group. His bright and well-made clothes compared to their rough garments.  
  
"You're German isn't very good." grumbled the apparent leader, distinguishable from the others only because he was bigger and dirtier.  
  
"I know, I know. Look, can we please take this outside? I don't want the bar to get trashed." Shinji replied, with some difficulty. Like the man had said, his German was only barely passable.  
  
Beside him, Misato looked up from whatever drink she was onto now.  
  
"What?" she mumbled in Japanese. "Awww, not again. I'll help you, Shinji-i..."  
  
"That's okay Misato. Why don't you stay here and guard our drinks instead?"  
  
The last thing that Shinji wanted was his drunk friend to get clobbered, just out of some vain attempt to help him. Escorted by the leering mob, he made his way outside.  
  
As soon as they were clear of the bar, the leader started to taunt him again.  
  
"Where'd you get such fancy clothes, eh? How's about you tell us where you and your friends get all that advanced stuff?"  
  
"We make it." Shinji said evenly, wondering where the first attack was going to come from.  
  
A moment later he was answered when the leader let out a great bellow and charged forward, swinging his right arm in a mean arc. Shinji stepped under the wild swing and hit the man with an uppercut that sent the man flying. There was no time to savour his victory, however, as the rest of the mob took the signal and rushed him too.  
  
Even as he dodged and counter-attacked, there were still far too many of them to make it a clean fight. He started to take more and more hits, even as more and and more of the ruffians got knocked down. After a rough couple of minutes, both sides backed off, regarding each other suspiciously.  
  
Shinji's clothes were torn and ragged now, and he felt very bruised and abused, but he had managed to hold them all off. The men regarded him with familliar hostility and suspicion. How had one boy held off a dozen burly men? was undoubtably the thought that was at the forefront of each of their minds.  
  
With a roar, the leader picked himself up off the ground and ripped the railing off of the bar's porch. Holding the length of wood like a big club, he took an overhead swing at Shinji, who made no apparent move to dodge the incoming attack. Instead, he just raised his arm to block it. Unsurprisingly, the railing shattered with the force of the impact. Surprisingly, Shinji's arm was only knocked back a couple of inches.  
  
As everyone stood gaping at that, Shinji did a running dropkick and knocked the leader back against one of the wooden posts holding up the bar porch's roof. Blinking through the pain, the leader looked up in time to see and dodge the incoming fist aimed for his head. The follow-through of the punch went right through the post.  
  
The leader stumbled back, not really wanting to fight this kid anymore. When you picked on little strangers, you didn't really expect them to turn around and kick the living bejeezus out of you. At that minute, he was saved the trouble of finding a face-saving way out when one of the kid's companions ran out of bar, shouting for him.  
  
"Commander Ikari, sir!"  
  
Shinji looked up.  
  
"Yes, Madison?"  
  
"The Yggdrasil is sending the pickup in a couple of hours.  
  
"Thank you. Tell them that we'll be there." He looked around at the bruised and bleeding forms of the town's toughs. "We've overstayed our welcome at any rate."  
  
"Ikari?" the leader growled, and there were murmers of anger from all over the square, even from people who had not participated in the fight. "As in the thrice-damned Ikari who caused the third impact?"  
  
Shinji looked at the man, his eyes reflecting some great inner pain.  
  
"No, I'm his son." he said softly.  
  
And then he went back inside, leaving a slightly confused group of townsfolk outside.  
  
****************************************************************************  
  
Inside, things weren't much better. Some macho guy was hitting on Misato, and in her condition, she was trying to flirt back. Except that all that was coming out of her mouth was a set of random syllables. Slapping his forehead, Shinji set about the task of getting her out of there before she did something that she would really regret.  
  
"Excuse me," he said, putting his arms around Misato's shoulders and lifting her gently to her feet. "but I think that the lady's had enough to drink."  
  
"Just who do you think you are?" the guy protested indignantly. "We were just getting to know each other better."  
  
"I'm sure you were." Shinji said drily.  
  
"That does it!" the stranger said, rising to his feet. "You want to take this outside?"  
  
Shinji thought of the situation that he had left behind in the town square.  
  
"Not right now." he replied.  
  
"Fine then. I'll meet you at midnight, in the glen south of the old mill."  
  
"Whatever..."  
  
"What was that? You'd better be there, or else!"  
  
"I'll be there, dammit!" Shinji snapped, losing his patience. "Now get off my case, I've got places to go!"  
  
The man sniffed derisively and sauntered off, his long blond spikes bristling as he went. Oddly enough, the blond locks almost seemed to have black stripes across them, but people's hairstyles were there own business, Shinji reflected.  
  
He hoisted Misato over his shoulders, then turned and tossed a couple of coins to the bartender.  
  
"That's for the damage to the porch." he explained. "Now, which way is the back door?"  
  
The bartender pocketed the change and smiled understandingly, while surreptitiously pointing towards the washroom area. Shinji nodded back in thanks, then gathered up his crew and beat a hasty retreat.  
  
****************************************************************************  
  
Unsure of what form of duel exactly the stranger wanted, Shinji brought along his combat dagger and his pistol to the glen with him. It would not do for him to get killed just because the other guy had brought weapons and he hadn't.  
  
When he got there, he stood in the glen for a couple of minutes, waiting for his opponent. Then, one of the shadows detatched itself from the base of a large tree on the clearing's edge. Shinji noticed the pair of knives at his belt, and made ready to draw his own.  
  
"Hmmpf. So you are here." the man said bemusedly. "I was unsure whether or not you'd remember."  
  
"I remembered, but I'm not particularly keen on fighting you unless I have to." Shinji replied. "Why do you want to fight me?"  
  
"To teach you that no one messes with my affairs!"  
  
"Look, I was just trying to help my friend get out of a situation she might later regret."  
  
"Are you saying that anything to do with me is regrettable?"  
  
"Ummm, no..."  
  
"Then what ARE you saying?  
  
Shinji growled in frustration.  
  
"She was drunk, alright? Had she been sober I wouldn't have intervened. Now, are we going to do this or what?"  
  
And with that, he drew his dagger. To his surprise, the other man discarded both his knives.  
  
"I thought that we'd to this with our bare strength and skill." he said, smiling wickedly.  
  
"Suits me." Shinji said, dropping both of his weapons.  
  
The two circled each other for a minute, measuring how well they could expect the other to fight. Then the stranger launched himself through the air, his legs snapping in a scissor kick. Shinji caught both his ankles and whipped him into the ground. Shinji attempted to follow up with a kick to his prone opponent, but the other man grabbed his feet out from under him.  
  
They rolled around on the ground for a trading blows with their knees and elbows, before they broke apart and rose once again to their feet.  
  
"Not bad, kid." the stranger said. "You are actually pretty tough. It's a pity, really."  
  
"What are you rambling about?" Shinji said, in the mood for fightning, not talking.  
  
"I'm saying that you don't have a chance... against... THIS!!!"  
  
The last word turned into a primal, perhaps even feral, scream. It echoed throughout the forest, driving fear into the hearts of any and all beasts that heard it. What happened next would have given Shinji nightmares for the rest of his life had those nightmares not already been guaranteed by the compound horrors he had experienced whilst fighting against the Angels. Before his eyes, the stranger's clothes strained and ripped apart under the stress of the rapid muscular expansion going on as his body seemed to grow to about three times its original mass. Tiger-coloured and -patterned hair sprouted all over his body, and even the bone structure seemed to rearrange itself to allow the final form to look something like a huge, superpowered tiger standing on its haunches.  
  
"Damn!" Shinji exclaimed, just before it leapt at him, fangs and claws bared.  
  
Realizing that it would be almost impossible to defend himself against this monster, Shinji switched to full offense. As it descended upon him, he swung around and connected a full roundhouse kick on the side of its head, throwing off its attack. Still, the claws swiped at him and opened bright crimson gashes where they struck. Shinji fell back, and it tried to get on top of him, but he caught it on his feet and sent it flying.  
  
Looking around desperately for a weapon, Shinji alighted on a tough old branch. It probably wouldn't be strong enough to use as a club, but if he snapped off one end... Without hesitation, he got back to his feet and did so, and just in time too. The weretiger was charging back, once again relying on its overwhelming advantage in speed and power. Just before it reached him it jumped slightly, so that it was cannoning right at him.  
  
Shinji braced himself and caught its forelegs, whipping his head to the side to avoid the snapping jaws, but he hadn't counted on the beast's cunning. Using his grip on its forelegs as leverage, the weretiger swung its backlegs up and under and delivered a spiky kick to Shinji's chest, knocking the young man to the ground.  
  
But Shinji wasn't done yet. He gripped the makeshift spear tightly and rammed it through the creature's thigh. Even as it roared in pain, Shinji connected a hard punch with its head, knocking it off him once again. He leapt immediately to his feet, but the were-tiger was faster. It cuffed him on the head with one mighty paw, raking its claws across his face.  
  
Shinji was knocked once again to the ground, but this time fortune was with him, and his weapons were within reach. He grabbed them and whirled on the creature, which was just starting another attack. The beast seemed to realize that something was wrong, but couldn't move nearly fast enough to avoid the volley of bullets that pierced its thick hide and raced through its body.  
  
"Gotcha!" Shinji cried triumphantly.  
  
Indeed, the weretiger, badly wounded, collapsed pretty quickly. Unable to maintain its more powerful state, it reverted to human form. For a minute, both the combattants just lay there, unmoving, trying to recover some part of their strength. Eventually, Shinji dragged himself over to the stranger.  
  
"How ya holding up?" he gasped.  
  
"Just fine." the other wheezed. "Pretty much the same as you."  
  
"Can you walk?"  
  
The stranger snorted, and indicated the length of wood sticking out of his thigh.  
  
"With this? I don't think so."  
  
"There's a boat waiting to pick me up." Shinji tried to explain. "All we have to do is make it to the edge of the bay, and then we'll get proper medical treatment."  
  
The stranger considered this for a moment, then nodded in agreement.  
  
"I'll help you if you help me."  
  
Shakily, the pair dragged themselves to their feet. Leaning on each other for support, they staggered off towards the bay and the waiting boat.  
  
"You know what?" Shinji said after they had walked for a bit.  
  
"Do tell."  
  
"You never told me your name.  
  
"You never told me yours either." the stranger pointed out.  
  
Shinji let out a wracking wheeze that may have been a chuckle under other circumstances.  
  
"Good point. I'm Shinji Ikari."  
  
"Maxmillian Kleitel. Call me Max."  
  
The introductions belatedly completed, the two continued their uneven pace. After another while, Max let out a couple of bloody coughs of his own.  
  
"You okay?" Shinji asked, even though he personally felt just as badly off.  
  
"Yeah. I just thought of something. I ripped up all my clothes. I'm naked."  
  
"Well, so you are. I hadn't really noticed, the pain was kinda getting to me."  
  
"Tell me about it."  
  
"Anyway, don't worry about it. Survival first, clothes second."  
  
"Sounds good to me."  
  
****************************************************************************  
  
Madison leaned against hull of the landing craft, fretting about the delay. What the hell is taking the Commander so long? she wondered. It's not like he doesn't know how to handle self-righteous macho fools..  
  
Li, the other crew member operating the launch, was busy scanning the forest edge for any sign of their erstwhile superior officer.  
  
"There!" he cried suddenly, indicating a point not too far down from where they waited.  
  
Sure enough, a form could be seen moving uneasily through the moonlight. Upon closer inspection, Madison realized that it was actually two forms, leaning on each other for support. Her worries about the Commander's health foremost on her mind, she rushed forward.  
  
Surely enough, there stood Commander Ikari, his shirt shredded and blood-soaked. Multiple slash wounds covered his face and arms, and he looked as if he had just been to hell and back. His companion wasn't much better off, bleeding from what appeared to be a dozen gunshot wounds, and with a large stake sticking out of his thigh.  
  
It was as she stared at the stake that Madison realized just how much of the stranger she could see. Fortunately, the poor light hid her furious blush.  
  
****************************************************************************  
  
When Shiji came to, the first thing that he saw was the happy, smiling face of Shana, the Yggdrasil's ship-board doctor.  
  
"Good to see you Commander." she said brightly. "You know, those were some nasty wounds you had there. All told, you had a total of thirty-seven puncture, slash, and crush wounds. And a mild concussion."  
  
"How long have I been out?"  
  
"All week."  
  
"WHAT!"  
  
Shana giggled, and Shinji realized that she was only joking at his expense.  
  
"Actually, Commander, you were only out all of last night. It's currently eleven hundred hours."  
  
"Urg. That's better. I've got work to do."  
  
Shinji tried to get up, but it was at this point that he found himself handcuffed to the bed. Rattling his chains, he glared at Shana.  
  
"Okay, what gives?" he demanded.  
  
"I'm sorry sir, but you have a habit of wandering off when you should be resting and recovering."  
  
"I order you to remove these handcuffs!"  
  
Shana merely grinned impishly.  
  
"No can do, Commander. Major Katsuragi was the one that ordered it."  
  
Grumbling, Shinji settled back. It was then that he looked over to the next bed and saw the recumbant form of Max Kleitel. He too was handcuffed to the bed, although he was about twice as bandaged as Shinji was. Noticing the direction of his gaze, Shana spoke up again.  
  
"I don't know what the two of you were up to," she tsked, "and I don't really want to know either, but I'm curious as to why you saw fit to shoot him so many times."  
  
"How do you know that I shot him?" Shinji said weakly.  
  
"Because the half-dozen bullets that we pulled out of his body matched exactly those that were loaded in your gun. Honestly, give us some credit here, Commander."  
  
"We were just having a wrestling match, and things got a little out of hand." he said, closing his eyes. If he was going to be stuck here, he might as well get some sleep instead of spending all his time being berated by the angry ship's doctor.  
  
Shana harumphed and turned away to tend to other matters. Looks like the Ikari understatement strikes again. she thought. Shinji was not known for being exactly the most forthcoming person.  
  
****************************************************************************  
  
"He what?" Ritsuko's face was a mixture of amusement and incredulity.  
  
"He comes back, half-dead and bleeding all over, dragging the other guy, who's in just as bad shape and naked to boot, at well past midnight. I swear, these macho things just seem to be absolutely crazy." Misato was shaking her head at the pointlessness of it all.  
  
Onscreen, her best friend and confidant grinned maliciously./p.  
  
"So what's this other guy look like?" Ritsuko asked.  
  
"I don't know! Madison was smart enough to cover the guy in a blanket as soon as she found him."  
  
"And you didn't peek?"  
  
"Ritsuko!"  
  
"What? I thought you said that Shinji had to separate you two earlier."  
  
Misato blushed bright crimson.  
  
"That doesn't count. I was drunk at the time. I don't even know the guy's name!"  
  
"Whatever. Well, it was good talking once again. Keep me posted."  
  
"Will do. Bye!"  
  
The screen went blank. Misato let her head fall to her desk. If anyone else, even Shinji, had just said what Ritsuko had, they would have been prying themselves off of the wall by this point. If they were still alive, that is. All the same, it was good to chat to her longtime friend, even if she always came out on the worse end of the conversations.  
  
A beeping sound indicated that someone was outside her door and wanted to talk to her.  
  
"Come in! she yelled.  
  
The door slid open to admit Shana.  
  
"What is it?" Misato asked.  
  
"Commander Ikari is demanding that we have the restraints removed."  
  
Misato rolled her eyes. It figured. Shinji was always trying to get out of the hospital, or medical bay, as the case may be, as quickly as possible.  
  
"Tell him that I ordered them placed there."  
  
"I did. He wants to see you. He's quite insistent about it."  
  
"Alright, I'll be right along. I just have to tend to our navigation first."  
  
Shana nodded and stepped back out. Chuckling to herself about Shinji's irrepressible nature, Misato set about plotting the Yggdrasil's course.  
  
Around her, the quiet hum of machinery subtly announced that all was well in her new base of operations.  
  
****************************************************************************  
End of Epsiode 1  
****************************************************************************  
Comments and suggestions are welcome.  
ragnar_murray@hotmail.com 


	2. Episode 2

Disclaimers: Let's continue with the rehtorical questions. If I wanted to make money off this fic, would I post it on a free-access site?  
  
Warnings: Well, although there wasn't any actual sexual innuendo in the last episode, it was more of a general warning of what was to come. Starting with this episode. Oh, and there'll be the standard violence and language, too. If you have a problem with either of those, then I'd like to know how you made it past the first fight scene in the last episode.  
  
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The New World  
Episode 2  
  
  
Max Kleitel stretched and yawned happily. He felt a little claustrophobic inside the Yggdrasil's halls, but there were more than enough perks to living in the giant submarine to make up for that slight discomfort.  
  
Besides which, he knew that it was just a residual attitude implanted in him during the changes that the Third Impact wrought upon his body. While he had always been athletic, he had never been able to jump three times his height effortlessly. Of course, the cat part in him also brought along its fair share of phobias, such as his current claustrophobia, or his fear of water.  
  
He sighed at that. He had been one of the lucky ones. At least the Third Impact had affected him beneficially, for the most part. Many others had become misshapen mutants or even worse, had been killed outright. Of course, there were rumours that a very few people had been turned into supermen by the Third Impact. He had discounted those rumours until about a week ago, when he met Shinji Ikari.  
  
The two of them had fought bitterly, Max as a giant tiger, and Shinji with his bare hands. Shinji wasn't a superman, Max knew from personal experience, but he was definitely more than just human. No one should have walked out alive, let alone victorious, out of an encounter with a weretiger.  
  
Eventually, he reached his destination, the Yggdrasil's command centre. It was early morning, before either of the ship's commanders usually came in, so he was often able to learn more from the bridge crew then than he would normally.  
  
He entered stealthily, sliding unnoticed over to a position right next to the door, and proceeded to watch the bridge crew's actions. His long and bushy tail swished lightly back and forth as he stood there. That's one of the perks of this place, he thought, they can design clothes to accomodate the most unusual things. He no longer had to stuff the damn thing into his pants uncomfortably, instead, it just stuck out of a specially designed hole in the seat of his pants.  
  
It wasn't long before Major Katsuragi came in. Taking one sweeping look at the bridge, she noticed him standing off to the side and sniffed derisively. As she made her way past him to her command chair, he made a soft sound deep in his throat that caused her to stiffen, then stomp the rest of the way to the chair.  
  
The door opened again, followed by a chorus of "Good morning, Commander Ikari!" from the bridge crew. Shinji walked in, unobstrusive and humble as ever, and waved good morning back to them. He noticed Misato beckoning him, so he sauntered over to her chair. When he got there, he was surprised by the look of frustration in her eyes.  
  
"You had better keep your 'friend' under better control, Shinji." she said darkly.  
  
"Who, Max? Why? What did he do this time?"  
  
"He PURRS every time I walk by him, or he walks by me! It's driving me crazy!"  
  
Misato stopped and glared at Shinji, who was obviously trying to hold back laughter.  
  
"I sorry." he appologised, still not doing a good job of containing his mirth. "I don't think that he can help it. It's a natural reaction, as far as he's concerned. Maybe if you let him rub against your leg..."  
  
"Shut your face!" Misato snapped. "And get out of my sight!"  
  
Her mood wasn't improved by the fact that the rest of the bridge crew was immersed in a deep course of instrument study, trying desperately to give the impression that they hadn't heard the conversation. Growling, she spoke up.  
  
"Alright. How long until we reach our destination and I can throw this stray cat off my ship?"  
  
Madison attempted to reply with a straight face, but failed miserably.  
  
"A-about two hours, M-m-major... snrkff."  
  
The young lady quickly hid her face, hoping that the intemperate Major wouldn't include her in her ire.  
  
****************************************************************************  
  
Later, when they had reached their destination, the landing boat set out, loaded with things like solar-powered generators and other technical gadgets. Max was trying to concentrate on anything except the water whipping around them, so he decided to talk to the pilot, Li.  
  
"So, what do you guys do with all this stuff?"  
  
The young man looked up from his controls for a minute.  
  
"What? Oh, the products. Well, we need raw resources to keep our operation going, so we use some of those raw materials to manufacture finished goods, which we then barter back to locals in exchange for what we need.  
  
"Neat." Max said, admiring the ingenuity of it. He looked around the boat, but couldn't see either Shinji or Major Katsuragi anywhere. "Hey, I don't see either of the commanders. Where are they?"  
  
Was it just him, or did Li seem a little uncomfortable about that? But the pilot answered in a casual tone.  
  
"Oh, they just had some more pressing business to attend to on the ship. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to concentrate on piloting this boat."  
  
The conversation obviously over, Max sat down and pondered what he had pieced together in the last week of knowing the crew of the Yggdrasil. They were far too militarily organized to be simple ship-borne peddlers, and their submarine was like nothing that Max had ever heard of. On top of that, what was the son of the man who had caused the Third Impact doing traipsing across the seas? Something wasn't quite right here, but Max's instincts told him that he would find out soon enough. Whatever their secret was, it was far too big for them to be able to hide it from him for long.  
  
Max trusted his instincts. Ever since the Third Impact, a couple of years ago, they had tended to be right almost all the time.  
  
****************************************************************************  
  
"Okay, the landing boat is away safely. What's our status?" Shinji said.  
  
They were inside the command centre of the Yggdrasil, the entire bridge crew there, plus a boy and two girls that looked to be the same age as Shinji.  
  
"Well, Commander," Madison answered, bringing up a large map of the area on the display. "about half an hour ago, our surface radar picked up a large group of super-mutants, roaming around the mountain area. We estimate that they will come across the town within a couple of hours."  
  
"We will be launching all four EVA's." Misato spoke up. "Now, with the exception of Shinji and Touji, none of you have ever actually piloted an EVA before, so this mission is going to be a sort of basic training for you. None of the targets has an AT Field, so this should be relatively easy for you."  
  
"You'll be launching from the Catapult, so you're going to be on battery power." Madison added. "Even with the shoulder packs, you're going to only have three minutes at maximum fighting level, so you'll have to make it quick."  
  
"What if we run out of power?" one of the girls asked.  
  
"In that case, Hikari," Shinji replied. "I'll finish the job off single-handedly. Any more questions?" There weren't any. "Good. Now, Touji will be piloting EVA-03, Hikari will pilot EVA-02, and Jen gets EVA-00. Move out, pilots!"  
  
As they ran off to their EVA's, Misato shook her head.  
  
"It's so different than it was with NERV."  
  
"Tell me about it." Madison agreed.  
  
****************************************************************************  
  
Max was having a good time in the town's bar. It was a lot better than the one in his former home, so he was busy experimenting with all-new sorts of alchohol. For the sake of keeping a low profile, he had his tail tucked into his pants, but he was having a good time nonetheless.  
  
The bartender glanced at the clock on the wall and sighed.  
  
"Almost time for Langley to come in."  
  
"Langley?" Max was curious.  
  
"Yeah," the bartender replied. "our best engineer. Knows more than any of the others, but is almost impossible to deal with. Tough as a club with nails in it."  
  
"Ouch. And this Langley always comes in at this time?"  
  
"Almost religiously." the bartender assured him.  
  
The doors opened not very long after, and the bartender said grimly,  
  
"Here's Langley."  
  
Max looked over for his shoulder, uncomprehending. All that stood in the doorway was a girl, maybe seventeen or eighteen, with bright red hair. Then it penetrated his alcohol-befuddled brain that this was the feared Langley. He nearly fell off his chair laughing.  
  
"This... is the... terrible... Langley?" he gasped between bursts of laughter.  
  
The redhead's eyes narrowed, and she marched over to where he sat. The next thing Max knew, he was lying on the floor with a terrible pain in the side of his head that wasn't alcohol-related.  
  
"Idiot." she said loudly. "You deserve much worse." She turned to the bartender. "Where'd this asshole come from anyway?"  
  
The bartender had seen the roundhouse kick that had sent Max flying, and he gulped. Whenever Langley was in a bad mood, she tended to take it out on everybody. Actually, come to think of it, she took everything out on everyone.  
  
"He came with the traders." the bartender said timidly, handing over her favourite drink. The bartender too had once been on the wrong end of the temperamental girl's wrath, and it had taken several weeks for all of the injuries to heal.  
  
"You mean the guys with the high-tech stuff?" Langley asked. The bartender nodded in reply. Langley smiled at that. "Yeah, I think that I'll go have a look at what they've got after I'm done here.  
  
"You sure? We don't need any outsiders' stuff here."  
  
"What do you mean?" Langley snorted derisively. "We may be lucky and still have some operating technology, but we need more if we're ever going to make this town into half the place it was before the Third Impact."  
  
Any further debate was cut off when a man ran into the bar, screaming at the top of his lungs.  
  
"Super-mutants!" he cried. "God help us, it's a whole pack of super-mutants!"  
  
Instantly, Langley was out the door and running for the observation tower. She quickly scurried up the ladder and grabbed the binoculars from the hands of the lookout.  
  
Scanning the mountains, she indeed found the pack with ease. She swore under her breath, the town had nothing to defend itself against monsters this size. Maybe, if they were lucky, the traders had something, but Langley personally doubted it.  
  
She suddenly realized that the man she had clobbered in the bar was standing next to her. She wondered momentarily how he had got up here so fast, but that thought was swept away by the ton of other concerns that were foremost on her mind at the moment.  
  
"I wonder if they knew about this." the stranger said to himself.  
  
What the hell does that mean? Langley wondered, but her thoughts were interrupted when the ground trembled under a mighty crash. That came from the direction of the sea! she realized.  
  
****************************************************************************  
  
Shinji was the first to be launched from the Catapult, a variant of the launch elevators of the old NERV centre. Instead of firing the EVA vertically however, the Catapult launched them horizontally. It was the Yggdrasil's solution for the need to get EVA's to a battle area quickly.  
  
Behind him, EVA's 03, 02, and 00 landed in succession. They all held a pallet gun in one hand, just as EVA-01 did, but Shinji also held a spear in his other hand. Shinji dropped his EVA to a crouch, then sprinted off in the direction of the super-mutant pack. The others followed him closely.  
  
****************************************************************************  
  
"It's a second group of super-mutants!" the lookout cried, looking through another pair of binoculars. "And they're closing fast!"  
  
Langley, however, was just staring through her binoculars.  
  
"No..." she said softly, unbelieving. "It can't be..."  
  
In the enhanced vision of the binoculars, she saw the sleek armoured forms slide onto one knee and bring up their large rifles.  
  
"But..." she protested once again.  
  
Max didn't have a pair of goggles, although with his keen vision he could just barely make out the forms of the second group. He was wondering what the girl was blabbering about, when suddenly a large amount of tracer fire erupted from the distant figures and crashed into the first group of super-mutants.  
  
****************************************************************************  
  
Shinji's rifle clicked empty at the same time as everyone else's, so he simply discarded it and hefted his spear.  
  
"All EVA's, discard pallet guns and follow me. Prepare for close combat." he ordered.  
  
They complied, and once again the EVA's set off at a break-neck pace, racing towards their targets. The giant super-mutants, long the bane of post-Third Impact civilization, had actually come quite close to the town before the sudden rifle volley stopped them in their tracks.  
  
EVA-01 let out a terrible war-cry as it threw its spear at one super-mutant. The force of the impact impaled the mutant and sent it flying, spraying blood as it went.  
  
****************************************************************************  
  
"Holy shit!" Max yelped as he saw the purple beast throw a huge spear through one of the giants. "What the hell are those things?"  
  
Before their eyes, and the eyes of the whole town, the four EVA's proceeded to cut into their enemies with prog knives, sending blood spraying all over the rocky countryside each time they scored a hit.  
  
"They're Evangelions..." Langley answered him, almost in a daze.  
  
****************************************************************************  
  
Hikari was knocked back, her EVA falling against a cliff face. In front of her, the super-mutant that had knocked her back raised its hand to deliver another blow to her EVA. Hikari crossed her arms in front of her face to ward off the attack.  
  
But the attack never came. EVA-01 appeared out of nowhere and sliced half the creature's forearm off, before grabbing the mutant's neck in its other hand and driving it into the cliff next to EVA-02. As it collapsed to its knees, Shinji slashed it deeply in the back, sending blood spraying over both the EVA's as the super-mutant's back split open.  
  
Although drenched in blood, EVA-01 didn't dawdle, but quickly moved on to another part of the battlefield. After a moment's hesitation over the grisly remains of the mutant, Hikari did likewise.  
  
****************************************************************************  
  
In the Yggdrasil's command room, the bridge crew watched the progress of the battle. For their first sortie, the girls were actually doing pretty well.  
  
"What are the pilots' sync ratios?" Misato asked.  
  
"Pilots Bui and *Hikari* are operating at sixty-four and sixty-eight percent synchronization, respectively." Madison reported.  
  
"Not bad, but it could be better." Misato mused. "How about Shinji and Touji?"  
  
"Well, pilot Suzihara is currently at eight-five percent sync, and pilot Ikari is at one hundred and twenty-six percent."  
  
"Good. How are they doing for power?"  
  
"Ummm..."  
  
****************************************************************************  
  
Langley stared at the purple giant as it wreaked havoc on its foes.  
  
"Shinji..." she whispered.  
  
Max's keen ears however, heard her soft tone.  
  
"Shinji?" he asked her. "As in Shinji Ikari?"  
  
The mention of EVA-01's pilot's full name seemed to bring Langley out of her daze. Her head whipped around and she glared at Max.  
  
"How do you know Shinji?" she demanded.  
  
"I only just met him last week..." Max started to explain, but was cut off mercilessly.  
  
"YOU MEAN YOU KNEW SHINJI AND YOU DIDN'T SAY ANYTHING TO ME?" Langley screamed at him. "I SHOULD GUT YOU ALIVE FOR THIS!"  
  
****************************************************************************  
  
Jen Bui was in the middle of grappling one of the few remaining mutants when suddenly her cockpit flashed red. She looked at the power countdown and was horrified to find it under ten seconds and closing fast on zero.  
  
"NO!!!" she screamed in frustration.  
  
But it was no good, and everything went dark as power failed on all systems. Fortunately, the life-support had a backup, so she wouldn't suffocate, but she might well be ripped apart by an irate mutant.  
  
****************************************************************************  
  
"Power has failed on all EVA's except Unit 01!" Madison reported.  
  
"You're on you're own now, Shinji." Misato said into the comm.  
  
"Understood." Shinji's face winked back at her from the comm screen before disappearing.  
  
"What? This can't be!" Madison said in disbelief.  
  
"What is it?" Misato asked, concerned.  
  
"Unit 01's sync ratio is rising rapidly! No, it's stabilizing at two hundred and forty-seven percent!"  
  
"He just doubled his sync ratio," Misato chuckled, "what a guy."  
  
****************************************************************************  
  
A pair of compartments opened up on EVA-01's hips, and Shinji withdrew a pistol from each of them. Without bothering to pause to aim, he blasted away at the mutants crowding the recumbant forms of his comrades. The mutants realized that one of the EVA's was still a threat, but by that time there were only a handfull of them left.  
  
Discarding the empty pistols, Shinji drew his spare prog knife and leapt into the fray. As he viciously kicked and slashed his way through them, EVA-01 and the surrounding mountains and cliffs became more and more coated with blood. Pausing momentarily, the EVA reared back its head and let out another terrible screech. And then it was right back to the business of slaughtering the super-mutants.  
  
****************************************************************************  
  
"You mean Shiji's in that... monster?" Max asked incredulously.  
  
"Of course dumb-head! Who else do you think is piloting it!" Langley snapped at him.  
  
"It doesn't look like anyone sane's piloting it..." he said, eyeing the frenzied way it tore apart its enemies.  
  
"That's because you're stupid!"  
  
As they watched on, EVA-01 picked up one mutant by the head, and then drove it into the ground, crushing the skull and sending brains flying in all directions. Another mutant tried to take advantage of EVA-01's distraction and jump it while it crouched over the body that it had just killed, but the unicorned head snapped up and glared at it. Then, without any warning, the super-mutant simply ripped in half, the two halves landing quite some distance from each other.  
  
****************************************************************************  
  
"What the hell? He's manipulating the AT Field!"  
  
"Calm down, Madison." Misato said, although she was privately a little astonished herself. "He's done that same move before."  
  
She didn't mention that he had done it while at a sync ratio of over 400%, and that he hadn't really done it but rather the awakened beast that was EVA-01 had been responsible. She didn't mention any of the circumstances of that incident because, quite frankly, the bridge crew had enough to worry about as it was.  
  
****************************************************************************  
  
Suddenly Shinji found himself down to the last mutant. It was actually hugely obese, and he had never seen its like before. But that didn't really matter, because it was going to be dead within a matter of seconds anyway. Before his enemy could react, Shinji cut a deep gash into its chest with his prog knife, then reached in with his other hand and ripped out the thing's heart.  
  
He was quite surprised when the thing then picked up EVA-01 and whipped it into a nearby cliff face. As he got back to his feet, he wondered aloud,  
  
"What the hell? Didn't I just rip out its heart?"  
  
"Shinji!" Misato's voice rang over the comm. "That thing probably has two hearts. You'll need to destroy the other one to kill it."  
  
"Just great." Shinji muttered. "Any idea where it is?"  
  
"Uhhh, no."  
  
"Even better." Shinji grumbled, cutting the connection.  
  
He realised that he had lost his second knife when he took his impromptu flight, so he gritted his teeth and started forward anyway.  
  
"I guess that I'll have to do this the old-fashioned way."  
  
EVA-01 was about sixty meters away from the fat mutant when suddenly the latter's arms shot out, stretching remarkably, and attempted to slam the EVA down. However, just before they reached the purple-armoured beast, they ran into an octagonal field and bounced away harmlessly.  
  
Shinji waited until the fat mutant had withdrawn its arms before making his own move. Sprinting forward suddenly, he grabbed the creature's upper left arm in one hand and its neck in the other. As it flailed helplessly beneath him, he squeezed and pulled with both arms. A sickening tearing sound announced the removal of the arm from its socket. Still holding onto the mutant's neck, EVA-01 swung the arm around...  
  
****************************************************************************  
  
To top off the whole gory spectacle of the battle, the town's residents watched as EVA-01 tore the arm off its one remaining enemy and proceeded to use it to bludgeon the creature's head. The mutant's remaining arm flailed and spasmed with each blow, until finally its death throes waned and it only shuddered slightly each time the EVA landed a blow.  
  
After a while, EVA-01 stood up and dropped its makeshift weapon next to the body that it had originally come from. The townsfolk could see that only a pulpy mass, akin to a huge deflated football, remained of the head. The formerly slab grey mountains to the north of the village were covered in great smears of crimson, and small rivers of blood had formed, draining away the vast quantities of blood from the battlefield.  
  
"Well, that was just about the grossest thing that I've ever seen." Max said.  
  
Langly, however, just watched the tall form of EVA-01, its armour now more red than purple. After a minute, she turned to Max.  
  
"Guess what? Today's your lucky day, you get to take me to meet Shinji and whoever else he's hanging around with nowadays."  
  
"And what if I don't?" Max sneered at her.  
  
A moment later, when Langley's eyes narrowed and she glared at him evilly, he wished he hadn't said that.  
  
****************************************************************************  
  
"Battle complete. All targets eliminated." Shinji reported.  
  
"Well done, Shinji! We'll send out the recovery teams now, so just sit tight for a bit." Misato beamed at him.  
  
Shinji nodded and closed the link. Misato next turned to Madison.  
  
"Dispatch the recovery teams. Tell them to also bring in the fat mutant and one of the regular super-mutants that didn't face EVA-01. We'll freeze them, and then let Ritsuko and her goons have a look at them later."  
  
"Alright. But, why one of the ones that was defeated by one of the other EVA's?"  
  
Misato laughed at her subordinate's confusion.  
  
"Because there will be more of it left to study, that's why. I don't know if you noticed or not, but EVA-01 tends to shred its enemies."  
  
Madison chuckled back at that and nodded in understanding. Satisfied, Misato turned to other matters.  
  
****************************************************************************  
  
"Look, there's the landing boat. Now, can you let go of my..."  
  
"No!"  
  
"Aiiie! Don't do that!"  
  
"Then shut up, stupid!"  
  
The landing boat was almost fully loaded when Li looked up at the two forms that were approaching. One was the outgoing Max Kleitel, obviously in a lot of discomfort, and behind him walked a red-haired young lady with a very determined cast to her face. The girl looked oddly familiar, and it took him a minute to remember where he had seen her before.  
  
"Alright, get this crate moving!" the girl was demanding.  
  
"Pilot Langley?" Li asked. "Is that you, Asuka Soryu Langley?"  
  
"I don't know about the first two names, but the last one fits. Aaarrrgh!" Max snorted, ending in a strangled cry.  
  
"Of course it's me." Asuka said. "Who else would it be?"  
  
"Well, I-, uh-, um-." Li stammered. He had forgotten what an overwhelming person she could be. "It's just that, ever since you disappeared in the Third Impact, we didn't know if you were alive or not, so it's kind of a shock to see you here."  
  
"Well, get over it! I'm here, now get moving already!"  
  
"Can you let go of my tail yet?" Max whined.  
  
"No! Shut up!"  
  
****************************************************************************  
  
Shinji was standing with the other pilots, watching the recovery teams fly the forms of two mutants back to the hold of the Yggdrasil, when he heard a familiar demanding voice behind him.  
  
"Alright, where's that Dumkopf?"  
  
"He's right over there. Look, you don't..."  
  
"That's enough out of you! I see him."  
  
Shinji turned around to see Max leading a beautiful redhead. The redhead's scowl was like a blast from the past to the lead EVA pilot.  
  
"Asuka?" he asked softly.  
  
"Shinji! I thought that I'd never see you again!"  
  
She ran towards him, and he noticed how graceful she moved, even when her face was clouded with so much emotion. They drew near to each other...  
  
... And then Asuka kicked him in the shin. Hard.  
  
"Aaargh!" he cried, hopping up and down on one foot while clutching his injured leg.  
  
"HOW COULD YOU LET SOMEONE PILOT MY UNIT 02?" Asuka screamed at him from point-blank range. "I OUGHT TO PUNCH YOUR SPLEEN OUT! WHO DID IT? WHEN I GET MY HANDS ON THEM I'LL MAKE ANYTHING I DO TO YOU SEEM LIKE A CHRISTMAS VACATION! Oh, hi Hikari!"  
  
"Umm, hi Asuka." Hikari responded nervously, fingering the cuffs of her plug suit and thankful that it was the uniform white for female pilots, not the red of the EVA that she had just piloted. "Look Asuka, I..."  
  
"One minute Hikari. I've got some business to finish with this Sheisskopf here first."  
  
"Ergh." Shinji grunted. "Will you listen to the girl?"  
  
"Shut up, stupid!"  
  
"I piloted EVA-02, Asuka." Hikari said, trying to get it over with as quickly as possible.  
  
Asuka glared at her old friend for a mimute, then shrugged.  
  
"At least it was one of my friends. I can live with that. Had it been one of your fellow stooges..." she finished menacingly.  
  
The mental image of Kensuke begging him before the battle to be allowed to pilot EVA-02 suddenly didn't make Shinji feel so guilty about refusing his friend's request.  
  
"Alright, everyone is dismissed." Shinji announced to the pilots. "You all did very well. Remember that the debriefing is in an hour and a half."  
  
After they had all wandered off, Asuka and Hikari talking like the blazes in an attempt catch up on the last two years, Shinji hobbled over to where Max stood massaging some life back into his much-abused tail.  
  
"Is she always like this?" the blond-haired man moaned.  
  
"Only when she's around me or one of my friends."  
  
"And how often is that?"  
  
"We used to be in the same class. Actually, we used to live together."  
  
"Ahhh. I see. Hard feelings, eh?"  
  
"What? No! No, it wasn't anything like that. We just used to have the same guardian, so we lived in the same appartment. In fact, I used to know every time she was changing because she would yell at me not to look."  
  
They both shared a laugh at that. Then an idea struck Shinji. He grinned at Max.  
  
"You know what would make the pain go away faster?"  
  
"Do tell."  
  
"Raiding Misato's liquor stash."  
  
"Won't she kill us for that?"  
  
"Only if one us blabbers. Come on, let's go!"  
  
"I'm with you all the way!"  
  
****************************************************************************  
End of Epsiode 2  
****************************************************************************  
Comments and suggestions are welcome.  
ragnar_murray@hotmail.com  



	3. Episode 3

Disclaimers: More rhetorical questions. In the (unlikely) event of anyone with a legal claim to Evangelion reading this, and (even more unlikely) they decide to sue me for writing it, what are the odds that I'll have the money to pay even their legal fees, let alone any damages?  
  
Warnings: Blood! Blood splatterd against the wall! Swearing! More swearing than a death metal band on tour! Sexual Innuendo! Enough sexual innuendo to make a certain recent President blush! I think that that about sums up what's to be afraid of this time around.  
  
****************************************************************************  
  
The New World  
Episode 3  
  
  
The Instrumentality of Man.  
  
  
The Next Step in Human Evolution.  
  
  
The Joining of an Angel with the Mother of Humanity, Lilim.  
  
  
The Third Impact.  
  
****************************************************************************  
  
SEELE, the hidden council, conceived of the Third Impact as a way for man to overcome its current stagnation. They were convinced that the Third Impact would mean the unification of all human souls into one perfect being.  
  
They were wrong.  
  
****************************************************************************  
  
The masses of humanity believed the Third Impact would be a repeat of the Second Impact, only on a far more catastrophic level. This time, none of the race of Man would survive the terrible holocaust.  
  
They too were wrong.  
  
****************************************************************************  
  
Gendo Ikari, a renegade member of SEELE, believed that he could manipulate the Third Impact to allow him to rejoin his dead wife. He beleived that he could achieve that goal by twisting SEELE's plans and initiating the Third Impact on his own terms.  
  
He was right.  
  
But that is irrelevant.  
  
****************************************************************************  
  
Like an otherworldly lawn mower, the Third Impact sucked up mankind and spat it back out in pieces. Some people did experience some sort of evolution, but nothing like SEELE had expected. Many were completely unaffected by the Third Impact, something for which they would never realize how lucky they were. Some people were thrown to the other side of the world than they had come from. Others became mutants, forced to live the rest of their lives in horribly twisted bodies, wandering the Earth until they were granted the merciful release of Death. Many did not emerge from the Third Impact at all.  
  
Whatever the individual results, civilization, already weakened by the Second Impact, was brought to its knees. Many technological devices had been destroyed by the etheral disturbances that were the side product of the Third Impact. Governments and countries collapsed as their people were unable to readjust to normal life.  
  
The Third Era of Man is an Era of chaos. As various forces try to put the world back together again after the devastation of the Third Impact, they are bound to come into conflict with one another over the eventual course of humanity. These conflicts will only further weaken the race of Man as it totters on the edge of oblivion.  
  
On the lips of every survivor is the name of the last universal villain: Gendo Ikari, the thrice-damned. Blamed by those who yet live for their misery, Ikari has taken a place in common thought patterns alongside Satan, Hitler, and Stalin.  
  
It is against this backdrop that the remnants of NERV gather to atone for their part in the implementation of the Third Impact...  
  
****************************************************************************  
  
"Asuka, have you seen my hard lemonade laying around anywhere?" Misato asked.  
  
"No. You probably got drunk and finished it all off and don't remember a thing about it."  
  
"Yeah, I guess so. All the same, I could have sworn it was here yesterday."  
  
The two were sharing one of the rooms in the Yggdrasil's sleeping quarters. All the rooms were identical, with two beds in each of them, but normally Misato and Shinji were given their own rooms. Lately however, they had each been forced to take a roommate until the sleeping arrangents could be properly sorted out.  
  
It had been Asuka's first night sleeping in a decent bed instead of on a wooden slab and a run-down mattress. She was, therefore, in a good mood. Adding to her good mood was the fact that she had immediately put that Dumkopf of a Third Child in his place as soon as she saw him yesterday.  
  
Misato resigned herself to the loss of her hard lemonade and opened up a tallboy. Watching her friend's morning ritual, another part of the old morning ritual came to mind.  
  
"Hey, where do we get food around here? Does Shinji cook it for us?" she asked Misato hopefully.  
  
"No such luck. While on the Yggdrasil we have to suffer through cafeteria food for breakfast, lunch, and dinner."  
  
Asuka pouted briefly, then her hunger won out and she got dressed enough to make it down to the cafeteria. She was about to go out when Misato called to her.  
  
"Oh, Asuka! Before you go, can you wake Shinji up? I usually do it myself, but I'm running a little behind today."  
  
Asuka sniffed in contempt, but headed next door and rang the buzzer until a bleary-eyed Shinji finally opened the door.  
  
"Alright already, 'm up Misa-" he paused as he realized who was facing him. "Oh, g'morning, Asuka. You didn't have to ring the buzzer so much, y'know."  
  
Asuka took one look at him and slapped him.  
  
"You should dress more decently if you're going to answer your door to a woman!"  
  
And with that, she stomped off towards the cafeteria, leaving Shinji standing in the doorway, wearing only his boxers. Misato sauntered out of her door and smiled at him.  
  
"Good morning." she said brightly. She indicated the rapidly reddning mark on his face. "I see that Asuka already got you up."  
  
"You knew she was going to do that." he accused.  
  
"What can I say? She's got a point, you should dress more decently. Besides which, I had to get you back for humiliating me in front of the entire bridge yesterday."  
  
And with that, she too wandered off in the direction of the cafeteria. Shinji waited until he was sure she was out of sight, the he went back inside.  
  
"Are they gone yet?" Max asked. "And what happened to your face?"  
  
"Shut up and help me get rid of these bottles."  
  
****************************************************************************  
  
It was about half an hour later that Shinji finally made it into the combined bridge/command centre of the Yggdrasil. As usual, everyone let out their usual chorus of "Good morning, Commander Ikari!". He waved back at them, then made his way over to Misato.  
  
"So, what's my schedule today?"  
  
"Let's see here..." Misato said, flicking through the computerized organizer. "You've got a pilot's meeting at 9:00. And then, right after that, we're going to run sync tests on all the pilots who participated in the battle yesterday, plus Asuka and minus yourself. Then, you get to command the ship for a bit in the afternoon while I take a break."  
  
"Yeah, I know all about your 'breaks'." Shinji muttered.  
  
"And what's that supposed to mean?" Misato demanded.  
  
"It means that you usually get sloshed and I end up having to take care of the ship for the rest of the day. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a pilot's meeting to attend."  
  
And with that, he beat a hasty retreat before she could find a suitably nasty rejoinder. On his way out, he whispered something in Max's ear, which set the man chuckling.  
  
"Alright," she demanded after the doors had closed behind Shinji, "what did he say?"  
  
****************************************************************************  
  
Asuka was sitting next to Hikari in the Yggdrasil's pilot lounge, talking away the time until the meeting started. She had to admit, the lounge was very nice. It was a pity they hadn't had anywhere like this back when they were with NERV. She noticed that the twenty or so kids that also occupied the room were all from her old A-2 class, but she didn't think much of that, she was far too bored right now.  
  
"Hey, what's holding up the meeting?" Asuka asked her friend impatiently.  
  
"We're waiting for the lead pilot to get here." Hikari replied. "Oh, wait, here he is!"  
  
Asuka looked up in time to see Shinji walk through the doors and head for the front of the room.  
  
"You mean SHINJI is the lead pilot?" she gasped incredulously.  
  
"Of course. He's been the only one here who ever fought against the Angels, and the next most experienced pilot is Touji, so there's not much in the way of choice."  
  
"Harumph! I leave for a couple of years, and look what happens! Pathetic."  
  
Hikari supressed a giggle at her friend's predictable reaction. But before she could add anything, Shinji called everyone's attention to the front of the room.  
  
"Alright, let's get this underway." he said. "Yesterday was the first full sortie of the entire EVA group. This meeting is to answer any questions or concerns that any of you might have developped, whether you piloted yesterday or not. Okay, open forum."  
  
One of the girls near the back put her hand up. Shinji saw it and nodded to her.  
  
"During the fight, most of the EVA's ran out of power. Will that happen every time?"  
  
"Good question, Estella." Shinji smiled benevolently. "Now, while most of the EVA's did run out of power before the end of this last fight, that was to be expected given the size of the enemy force. We just couldn't be expected to defeat them all before our batteries ran out. For this fight we were also testing out the Catapult, so we had to operate solely on internal and external batteries, but if we go into a planned battle we will most likely deploy from VTOL craft, with mobile generators."  
  
He shrugged helplessly.  
  
"What I mean to say is that it's unusual for us to run out of power in the middle of a fight. It shouldn't be a concern normally. Does that answer your question?"  
  
Estella nodded. Next, one of the boys put up his hand. Shinji saw him and grinned.  
  
"Yes, Kensuke?"  
  
"About the hip-holsters of Unit 01, how come the rest of the EVA's don't have them?"  
  
"The hip-holsters, as you call them, are still in the testing phase. We're not sure if they're worth the trouble for most of the EVA's because a battle will either be too short for us to need backup weapons, or we'll have armoury support, so for now only EVA-01 will be outfitted with them, until we're convinced that they're feasible for use on the other EVA's. Any other questions? Go ahead Crystal..."  
  
As the meeting dragged on, Asuka barely managed to keep her cool. All the questions that everyone was asking were so stupid! And Shinji's answers were all too predictable. Finally though, it seemed that people ran out of subjects to quiz their lead pilot on, and Shinji was able to draw the meeting to a close.  
  
"Oh, and one last thing." he said before they left. "EVA-02 is being withdrawn from the regular roster rotation and assigned to pilot Langley. I'm sorry, but you'll just have to suffer through the decreased rotation. And I'll need pilots Bui, Horaki, Langley, and Suzihara to report to the harmonics test room in five minutes for a Level Three sync test."  
  
There was a bit of grumbling at that, and Asuka recieved a couple of baleful glares, but generally people seemed to accept the news. Asuka caught Shinji before he left.  
  
"I'm glad you've found your brains again." she said. "You shouldn't have even considered letting anyone else pilot it in the first place."  
  
Shinji simply chuckled.  
  
"Whatever. You just get the test results to back me up, or I'll get lynched by the rest of them."  
  
"And it would serve you right. I'll show you, with the test..." she trailed off, her brow furrowed in concentration. "Did you say Level Three?" Shinji nodded. "You peverted Sheisskopf! I should string you out by your guts!"  
  
Hikari was slightly confused by this.  
  
"What's a Level Three test?" she asked Asuka.  
  
Shinji took advantage of the distraction to get out of the lounge before the tempestuous redhead could carry out her threat. Glaring at his retreating back, Asuka simply said.  
  
"You'll find out soon enough. And then you'll agree with me."  
  
****************************************************************************  
  
"You can't be serious! SHINJI IKARI, WHEN I GET MY HANDS ON YOU I'LL..."  
  
Hikari's screams and threats weren't the only ones, just the loudest.  
  
"Perversling! Baka Hentai! Dumkopf!"  
  
"Wow, talk about bilingual!" Max said admiringly.  
  
"Ikari, when I get out of here I'm going to tell Asuka just how close you came to letting Kensuke pilot EVA-02!"  
  
"WHAT?"  
  
"Oh great," Shinji muttered, burying his face in his hands. "I'm in for it now."  
  
"What kind of a sick joke is this, Shinji?"  
  
On the video monitor the bridge crew could see a bare white hall with five cubicles at the end. One of the cubicles stood empty, but the other four had their screen half-doors closed, covering the between the neck and the knees of each cubicle's occupant. It was still obvious though, from the vague and blurry skin-coloured forms visible through the screens, that all four pilots were stark naked.  
  
"Look, all of you, just listen to me!" Shinji said finally in exasperation. "We want to test your sync ratios without the interference of your plug suits. Asuka, Rei, and I had to do this more times than I could count when we worked for NERV, so I don't see what the Second Child is complaining about. Besides which, Misato's going to deactivate the camera just like she always did. Now, get marching!"  
  
He cut the connection and turned expectantly to Misato as the four figures on the screen started to walk forward.  
  
"Uhhh," he said after a while, trying his best not to glance at the screen. "Misato? Aren't you going to turn off the camera?"  
  
The entire bridge crew just laughed at that.  
  
"Actually, no." Misato chuckled. "That was always just our little joke."  
  
"You mean you never turned off the camera?"  
  
"Nope, COMMANDER Ikari." Madison giggled lewdly.  
  
Shinji balled up his fists in an attempt to contain his embarassment.  
  
"Then why the hell have I bothered to wear clothes for the last three years?" he said through gritted teeth.  
  
As everyone erupted into laughter, Asuka's face appeared on the comm-link.  
  
"Hey! How come the high and mighty Shinji Ikari doesn't have to run one of these tests?"  
  
"Because we already know more than enough about Shinji." Misato said, grinning wickedly.  
  
"And what's that supposed to mean?" Asuka asked shortly as more laughter came from the bridge crew.  
  
"Enough!" Shinji said crossly. "Fine, Asuka! I'll take the test!" He glared at everyone in the bridge. "What's one test more?"  
  
"Good, I'll be expecting you down here shortly!" Asuka said before disconnecting, completely oblivious to the true reason that Shinji was so angry.  
  
Misato's laughter was cut short when Shinji's shirt hit her in the face. Pulling the garment off her head, she looked incredulously at the enraged youth.  
  
"You're taking your clothes off here?"  
  
His glare hit her like a blast from the positron rifle.  
  
"I thought I'd take them off on the way. Save time and effort all round, you know?"  
  
And with that he stalked off, leaving the bridge crew unsure as to whether he was going to head for his EVA and get his revenge upon them, or to the test area. A moment later, everyone let out a collective sigh of relief as his naked form walked down the access corridor to the test plugs.  
  
"Looks like he's still mad at us." Madison reported.  
  
"I know, he's giving us BOTH fingers." Misato agreed. Into the mike, she said. "Shinji, we've prepped Tube 5 with the data from Unit 01."  
  
They didn't recieve any sort of answer, but Shinji nonetheless made his way towards the designated tube.  
  
"Simulating nerve connections." Madison said after he got inside. "Artificial Borderline reached. Displaying pilot's sync ratio."  
  
On the screen, in the bottom corner of Shinji's image, appeared a rapidly rising counter. As the entire crew watched, it went from 1 to 10 in a matter of a couple of seconds.  
  
"What! That's not possible!" Asuka complained as it passed twenty. "Our sync ratios can't rise that fast in the simulations!"  
  
"At least, they're not supposed to." Misato breathed while the counter went over thirty.  
  
"Ummm." Max spoke up. "I'm new at this, but isn't it a good sign that Shinji's ratio is going up so fast?"  
  
"No." Misato answered. "Look at everyone else's counters. They've been connected for three times as long as Shinji, and Touji and Asuka are still in the low twenties, Jen and Hikari aren't even that high, and Shinji's already past fifty!"  
  
"Wow! He must be really mad!"  
  
"Tell me about it."  
  
"Sync ratio in Tube 5 at eighty percent!" Madison reported incredulously.  
  
"That does it!" Asuka snapped. "Stop showing off, Dumkopf! I've only just met you again, and I'm already fed up with your antics!"  
  
"Oh, sorry Asuka." Shinji said, calming down slightly. "But Mis..."  
  
"I DON'T WANT TO HEAR IT!" The redhead screamed over the comm. "DON'T APOLOGIZE, JUST STOP!"  
  
"Ummm... Okay... Sorry..."  
  
"I don't believe it." Madison whispered, looking at one set of readouts. "His sync ratio is holding at ninety-two percent."  
  
"And he's not even anywhere close to his limit." Misato agreed, eyeing another screen. "Without the protection of his plug suit, that's amazing."  
  
"But Asuka's sync ratio is starting to pick up the pace."  
  
"Let's just sit back and watch, shall we."  
  
"It was THAT that got me angry in the first place." Shinji said from the comfort of his tube.  
  
Shinji and Touji were busy showering themselves off in the guys changing room after the test when the alarm klaxons started blaring.  
  
"No rest for the wicked." Touji said, rolling his eyes.  
  
Shinji didn't reply, he was already busy throwing on his plug suit. How does he get that thing on so fast? Touji wondered. I guess that it's just a lot of practice. Before Touji was even half done with his suit, Shinji was out of the door.  
  
****************************************************************************  
  
"Status?" Shinji demanded as he entered the bridge.  
  
"Large acquatic life-form detected. Pattern: Red. It's an unknown mutant type."  
  
Shinji grinned.  
  
"Perfect. Equip EVA's 01 and 02 with C-class weaponry, and attach a reinforced lifeline to EVA-02."  
  
"You're going for an underwater sortie?" Misato asked.  
  
"No, Asuka is. I'll stay abovedecks and provide support if neccessary. After all, she's the champion swimmer, isn't she?"  
  
****************************************************************************  
  
"Hmpf. At least Shinji had the sense to let me engage the enemy. That Dumkopf couldn't even swim in NERV's pool."  
  
Before her stood the red form of EVA-02. Technical crews were busy strapping what looked to be a rack of (relatively) short spears to the EVA's left thigh. As she watched them work, Shinji came up behind her.  
  
"They're harpoons." he explained.  
  
"I knew that, Dumkopf!" she sniffed, unwilling to admit that she had been somewhat mystified.  
  
"Of course." Shinji said, trying to hold back a smile and failing. "Silly me. Well, the work crews are almost done. Shall we get going?"  
  
"Why wouldn't we?"  
  
****************************************************************************  
  
A short while later, the pair of EVA's stood on the Yggdrasil's hull, weapons at hand. Both Shinji and Asuka had harpoon guns and spears, although Shinji's spear looked a lot fancier. Asuka was about to comment on this when Misato's voice rang out over the comm.  
  
"Here it comes! Unit 02, move out!"  
  
"Right-O!" Asuka shouted happily. It felt good to be back at the controls of EVA-02, like this was some crucial part of her that she had missed for the last few years. "That mutant isn't going to know what hit him!"  
  
As she dived over the edge, Shinji didn't even bother to try and hide his smile this time.  
  
Underwater, Asuka found that she had dropped nearly on top of the mutant. Her sudden appearance caused it to turn towards her instinctively, and it started to charge her with its maw wide open. It looked vaguely like a Manta Ray, Asuka reflected as she pulled the trigger on her harpoon gun. The small projectile flew towards the oblivious mutant, and lodged itself in the thing's left fin.  
  
Maddened now, the mutant rushed at EVA-02, but the lithe EVA darted out of the way at the last second and shoved its spear into the mutant's back. As it came around for another pass, trailing thick clouds of blood wherever it went, Asuka reloaded her harpoon gun and fired another shot into the brute's body. She was starting to wonder at the use of it, because each hit didn't seem to affect the big mutant other than make it angrier.  
  
She darted out of the way again, but this time its mouth closed on the power and lifeline cables. Realizing that it was about to try and drag her through the water, she ejected the cables in a fit of swearing. While it was still occupied with the cables, she put another harpoon into its back. The mutant realized that it no longer held its prey and released the cables, swimming far out from the Yggdrasil. Asuka thought that it might finally be running away until she saw it turn.  
  
"It's going to try and build up speed!" she said breathlessly. "I won't be able to outrun it."  
  
"Then get up here!" Shinji said.  
  
As EVA-02 scrambled up the side of the Yggdrasil's hull, the mutant realized where she was going and altered its course slightly. It burst out of the water and hurtled towards where it expected the annoying pest to be, only to see the red EVA sprawled at the feet of a purple one.  
  
Shinji's spear was no ordinary weapon. He had designed it personally, with some help from Ritsuko, and was quite proud of it. At a mental command, the large tip split apart and formed itself into three large progressive blades, equidistant from each other around the shaft. When the large form of the mutant burst from the water, he braced himself for the impact.  
  
Asuka looked up in time to see the mutant fall upon Shinji's odd spear. The force of the impact knocked Shinji backwards, but somehow he maintained both his upright position and his grip on the spear. With a mighty roar, EVA-01 levered the mutant right over its head and sent it crashing into the water, where it floated lifelessly. As Shinji withdrew the spear, Asuka could see what appeared to be the mutant's heart still trapped between the blades.  
  
"There." Shinji said triumphantly. "That wasn't so hard now, was it."  
  
"Ummm." Asuka said softly. "Shinji, you're... standing on..."  
  
As she trailed off, Shinji realized what was bothering her. The impact with the mutant had knocked EVA-01 off the Yggdrasil's hull, and it now stood on the water's surface. Before anyone in the bridge could clue in, Shinji shuffled over slightly so that he was standing on the floating corpse of the mutant.  
  
"Good battle Asuka." he said hurriedly. "We'll talk about this later. For now, deactivate so that the retrieval units can get you."  
  
****************************************************************************  
  
About half an hour later Asuka finally managed to corner Shinji. The fact that he was in the guy's changing room didn't deter her. He was half-out of his plug suit when the vision in red entered the room.  
  
"Uh, hi Asuka." he said, trying not to blush while pulling the suit back up a little. "Look, can this wait until later?"  
  
"What are you, stupid? Do you think that I'm going to let you run away without explaining to me just what the hell you were doing?"  
  
"Er, when?"  
  
"Don't play dumb with me! How come your EVA didn't sink when it got knocked onto the water?"  
  
Shinji was about to bury his face in his hands when he realize that to do so would mean letting go of the suit, and the last thing he needed right now was to be berated on his indecent lack of clothing, despite the fact that it was HIS changing room.  
  
"Okay, I'll tell you, but only if you promise not to tell any of the others. And that includes Misato, Hikari, whoever."  
  
Asuka put her hands on her hips and glared at him.  
  
"What is this, some big secret?"  
  
"Do you want to know or not?"  
  
"Alright. I promise not to tell anyone whatever stupid trick you're up to."  
  
"Good enough. What I did is called "skimming". If you remember, a lot of the angels used to be able to walk on water or just float throught the air. That's what I was doing, although I'm not very good at it, I'm not able to float through the air yet."  
  
"Very well then, I won't tell anyone on one condition."  
  
"WHAT? You already said you weren't going to tell anyone!" Shinji exploded.  
  
Asuka merely gave him an ineffable smile, and waited for him to give in, which he did shortly.  
  
"Fine. What's the condition?"  
  
"That you teach me how to do that."  
  
Of all the possible responses that Asuka had been expecting, the one that she had least been expecting was the one that Shinji gave. He just sat there, with his head hung low, and chuckled.  
  
"Well, is that your answer?" Asuka demanded.  
  
"If that's all you want," Shinji chuckled, "then I'd be glad to teach you."  
  
Asuka grinned triumphantly and swept out of the room. As soon as she was gone, Shinji stood, still chuckling slightly.  
  
"I'm still only beginning to understand, Kaorou." he said to no-one in particular. "And now I'm expected to help her? What a wonderful sense of irony God has."  
  
****************************************************************************  
End of Epsiode 3  
****************************************************************************  
Comments and suggestions are welcome.  
ragnar_murray@hotmail.com 


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